That was a shadow. A shadow person. Walked right through that building. Right. Turns on ignition. Everything is fine.
Loading memory. . .
"Oh yeah! Once you go up, you can never go down!"
Everything is fine.
Welp. My life completely changed after I met Sherry. I see things. Talk to things that aren't there, and hug random trees for support. Did you know the onset of schizophrenia in females is roughly age 23? I'm a bit late, but who's counting, right? That psychology degree really is coming in handy, though, huh?!
Am I right?!
Got ya! I am not crazy, nor do I have schizophrenia. Think otherwise? I don't blame you at all! Since meeting Sherry, we will fast forward to my average day, and I am sure I will CONVINCE you I am indeed not sane. I mean insane.
This is insane.
I would love to start with, "Oh, I woke up to this," but it doesn't start there. It doesn't start anywhere- because it NEVER STOPS.
My average day is ridiculous and has no starting or ending point. It. Is. None. Stop. Did I mention that yet? I cannot wait to introduce you to my insanity- have I used that word yet? If I had to choose a "start" for how my day begins, I would have to start in the middle of the night. Original right? It sounds like this.
"AHHHH!!!!! DID YOU SEE THAT?!"
My life is great.
I am woken up EVERY night by, what shall we call them, Spirits? I think that is the general consensus for anything other than living. Currently. What do they look like? Oh! I indeed do get spoiled with variation. Large. Small. Colorful. Black and terrifying. Crawling. Standing over me. Talking to me. Starring at me.
After I wake my honey…scare the sh#!t out of my honey. God bless his soul that he has put up with this for over 2 years…I have learned to simply fall back asleep and continue my drooling session. Has it always been that easy to go back to sleep after seeing the plague manifest into one horrific being?
Okay, they are rather pleasant looking most of the time, but even something cute can scare you half to death if you are in the MIDDLE OF SLEEPING.
They can be...cute.
Want to be my friend yet?
Still working on that part.
SO. After a beautiful night of being woken up by whoever (who?) wants to talk to me, I get up for the day and pretend I'm a normal human being.
Me: "Can you pass the syrup, please? Oh, Sam is having a rough time, by the way."
My poor honey: "Oh, you spoke with Sam?"
Me: "No, I'm channeling them."
My understanding, honey: "Oh, they're going through a rough patch."
*Insert my love and appreciation that this is a typical morning conversation and that this is nothing out of the blue or weird*
Me: "Yeah, they've been sending me thoughts and images since you started making e french toast."
I love this man: "Which animal is it this time?"
HE UNDERSTANDS AND ACCEPTS ME
Me: "A sapsucker."
Honey: "The hell?! Babe, hahaha, what is all this coo-coo ba-nana you spoutin'?!"
Me: "It's a bird!"
Honey: My boi Spirit sure does have a sense of humor, huh?!"
Me: "It means great fortune!!!"
Honey: "Baha! Tell my boi Spirit they have to wait until after breakfast to send you…birds (smirky wink)
Me: "But I can't help iiiiiiiit"
Honey: Love, eat your french toast. Sprit can wait."
I barely started my day, and I already have the farthest thing from a normal life. But honestly, who does? Well. Plenty, in my case.
Thank you for reading part….5? Of my peculiar and possibly disturbing life! I wanted to get through an average day of…me…but realized morning is long enough for most! I hope you had a laugh or found more reasons to send a text once every 6 months to a year or not at all!
I need more friends.
Until next time!